He’s not a dick, he’s just a 3 year old

If you think the 2’s are ‘terrible’, you obviously haven’t been the parent of a 3 year old.

Yesterday on my Instagram Stories, I referred to my son as a ‘dick’ – Playfully, I’ll add. He’d gone off to nursery for the day and I’d come back home to find all of his Minion stickers stuck down fast to my living room floor. The stickiest stickers ever, might I add. I nearly took my nails off trying to remove them and I still haven’t managed to get all of the sticky mess off my floor.

Last night, after a particularly whinge-filled dinner time, my other half jokingly said; “I’m going to go away for a bit, take some time out, and come back when he’s 4”. We’re yet to have a 4 year old but I’m praying they’re better than 3 year olds. Please tell me they are.

We (my other half and myself) often find ourselves asking each other; “Why is he such a dick?”.

He’s not a dick, he’s just a 3 year old.

Being 3 seems to have brought with it a new found independence and stubbornness. He wants to do everything by himself even if it takes him foreveeerrr. Like choosing his own clothes and getting himself dressed – resulting in a clash of colours, odd socks and shoes on the wrong feet. And then we have to take everything off and start over because; “I want to wear my OTHER Thomas paannttsss!!!”

He can also talk pretty well now and he will not shut up. Ever. But he also won’t listen to us. No matter how many times we tell him not to jump on the sofa…

Does your two year old cry? Well prepare yourself for 3 year old tantrums that are so epic you’ll think they’re possessed by the devil.

All of those meals you spend hours cooking (that are worth it when they are 2 because they eat anything and everything in sight)… Well, everything at 3 is; “I don’t like it”. And you’ll spend your time wondering why you even bother.

Also, your subconscious is now permanently on bladder and bowel watch ever since your 3 year old potty and toilet trained. And you must “Look at the big poo in the toilet Mummy!”

‘No’ means ‘yes’

But it can also mean no. And despite you thinking you know the secret answer, you WILL get it wrong. 3 year olds always go to their default ‘No’ setting for every question they get asked.
“Sweetheart, would you like some toast?”
(I finish making my own toast and retreat to the sofa to sit down with my twice-microwaved cup of tea).

(30 seconds later)…


For us as parents, we’re having to tap into a deeper level of patience and understanding that we never knew we had. It takes a lot of effort and we have to remind ourselves that he won’t be 3 forever. And of course that we love him… Most of the time.

And then I realise that we’ll be going through it all over again in 2 years time with our daughter – our beautiful, defiant, fierce daughter – god help us.



  1. January 10, 2018 / 1:23 pm

    Oh gosh! I thought we were on the downward part now with our 2.5 year old! She is ridiculously independent! Hoping for all our sakes 4 year olds aren’t so bad!!

    • January 10, 2018 / 1:30 pm

      I’ve been told it only gets worse. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news 🙈

  2. Keeley
    January 11, 2018 / 12:13 pm

    Ronnie is about to turn 4. The tantrums are few and far between. However, The ability to moan and “negotiate his terms” has certainly ramped up, resulting in some epic tears due to us being awful parents who ruin his little life.

    It won’t be long til we become fully fledged parents when he declares “I hate you”. I look forward to it.

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